stress and leave

All over again.. i am so stress that makes me losing weight 2kilos.
Almost a week i vomit. The worse one last week that 3 times i vomit during office hours. Then, i got a fever.
Almost 3 weeks i'm not having dinner at all. I skip my meal and my gastric become worse.
With all my guts, i stand up and apply leave for 3days. Just to tune myself back and to prepare for my next exam.
People dont understand my situation here. They can say that as an adult we need to control it. It is true but in some situation that they need to know and understand first the caused of it before making the judgement.
I know..who me to them to take care of my feelings. So whatever they wanna say, just go on. Hate to think much about them because they dont think about me at all. So why i need to take care of their feeling, right?
Now i enjoy my holiday. My chest pain has fade away. My bad headache also gone.
I have made a right decision on apply leave.
Thank you Allah for everything.
I just have only You who always by my side.

Last trip to over the sea

Mark on calendar.. 20th April 2014 (Sunday), lovely memories created! 5 days 4 nights not enough okay.
me not sleep at all on 19th April because:-
1. late packed my things. "Padan muka.."
2. scared of missing flight due to papa wanted to go to LCCT at 5a.m on the dot! (my fault for not suggesting a better time of departure..)

my uncle.. our pilot that fly us to Lombok. he himself asked AirAsia to allow him to take that job.

 At Senggigi Beach Resort. See the wave..

On the way to Gili Island.

I know it is nice at Gili Island. The sea is so blue. No filter at all.

Mini town at Gili Island.

Traditional transport still being used until now.

Me with my brother waiting for food. A unique restaurant's environment there.

Snorkeling with my brothers. Love it!

Love the sunset. I always dream of honeymoon at beach and see the sunset together while holding hands.So romantic okay.

Nice view. I know. :)

Lombok have 2 waterfalls but we only capable to reach at first stage of waterfall. 20 minutes walk with a little bit hiking make us so exhausted but in the end, we're happy when reach there.

Pit stop at rumah orang asli Lombok while waiting coconut juice to be served by them.

A view from resort.

Another view.. our selfie before go back home.

in this picture, the mountain back there is actually Bali Island. Eventually foreigners will stay 2,3 nights at Lombok then go to Bali by ferry; which only takes one hour to reach there.






It is worth spent my bonus to Lombok Island. This is my last trip to over the sea.
Now it is time for saving for future.
Enough for enjoyment.
Time and memories heals my heart back.
No more love, no more pain. But in the and, I still need a love to follow the sunnah.

Like Azie said to me, "don't ever hope to someone who never remember of you, never need you, never 
serious to you and who never take care of your soft heart.."
she don't want to see me being hurt again.
I love you, sis.. :')

Memory

"My All"

I am thinking of you
In my sleepless solitude tonight
If it's wrong to love you
Then my heart just won't let me be right
'Cause I've drowned in you
And I won't pull through
Without you by my side

I'd give my all to have
Just one more night with you
I'd risk my life to feel
Your body next to mine
'Cause I can't go on
Living in the memory of our song
I'd give my all for your love tonight

Baby can you feel me
Imagining I'm looking in your eyes
I can see you clearly
Vividly emblazoned in my mind
And yet you're so far
Like a distant star
I'm wishing on tonight
Give my all for your love
Tonight

A song that i sang to Najib a long time ago. Just a memory that suddenly go through in my mind.
Qada' and qadar Allah. I have no right to question of it.